I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from Kindergarten Cop: A Candid Conversation.

Arnold Schwarzenegger is rightfully celebrated as an Hollywood heavyweight. However, at the height of his blockbuster fame in the late 20th century, he also delivered several critically acclaimed comedies. A prime example is Kindergarten Cop, which marks its 35-year mark this December.

The Story and That Line

In the hit comedy, Schwarzenegger portrays a undercover cop who masquerades as a kindergarten teacher to locate a fugitive. Throughout the film's runtime, the investigation plot functions as a basic structure for Schwarzenegger to have charming interactions with kids. The most unforgettable involves a little boy named Joseph, who out of nowhere announces and declares the former bodybuilder, “Boys have a penis, girls have a vagina.” The Terminator replies icily, “Thanks for the tip.”

The young actor was brought to life by former young actor Miko Hughes. His career included a recurring role on Full House as the bully to the famous sisters and the character of the child who returns in the film version of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. Hughes remains active today, with a slate of movies in development. He also is a regular on fan conventions. Recently recalled his experiences from the production 35 years later.

Memories from the Set

Question: Starting off, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: I think I was four. I was the smallest of all the kids on set.

Wow, I don't recall being four. Do you remember anything from that time?

Yeah, a little bit. They're flashes. They're like picture memories.

Do you recall how you got the part in Kindergarten Cop?

My mother, mainly would take me to auditions. Frequently it was an open call. There'd be dozens of children and we'd all just have to wait, be seen, be in there less than five minutes, do whatever little line they wanted and that's all. My parents would help me learn the words and then, as soon as I could read, that was some of the first material I was reading.

Do you have a specific memory of meeting Arnold? What was your feeling about him?

He was extremely gentle. He was fun. He was nice, which I suppose isn't too surprising. It'd be weird if he was a dick to all the kids in the classroom, that probably wouldn't make for a productive set. He was fun to be around.

“It would be strange if he was a dick to all the kids in the classroom.”

I was aware he was a huge celebrity because my family informed me, but I had never really seen his movies. I sensed the excitement — he was a big deal — but he didn't really intimidate me. He was just fun and I was eager to interact with him when he had time. He was working hard, but he'd kind of play with us here and there, and we would dangle from his limbs. He'd tense up and we'd be dangling there. He was really, really generous. He purchased for each child in the classroom a yellow cassette player, which at the time was a major status symbol. It was the coolest device, that distinctive classic yellow cassette player. I used to rock out to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for ages on that thing. It wore out in time. I also have a genuine metal whistle. He had the coach whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.

Do you remember your time filming as being positive?

You know, it's interesting, that movie became a phenomenon. It was a major production, and it was a wonderful time, and you would think, looking back now, I would want my memories to be of working with Arnold, the direction of Ivan Reitman, visiting Astoria, seeing the set, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. For instance, they got everyone pizza, but I avoided pizza. All I would eat was the meat from the top. Then, the Nintendo Game Boy was just released. That was the big craze, and I was quite skilled. I was the youngest and some of the older kids would hand me their devices to get past hard parts on games because I was able to, and I was felt accomplished. So, it's all little kid memories.

The Infamous Moment

OK, that specific dialogue, do you remember the context? Did you understand the words?

At the time, I likely didn't understand what the word taboo meant, but I understood it was edgy and it made adults laugh. I knew it was kind of something I shouldn't normally say, but I was given an exception in this case because it was funny.

“She really wrestled with it.”

How it was conceived, from what I understand, was they didn't have specific roles. A few scenes were established early on, but once they had the entire ensemble assembled, it wasn't necessarily improv, but they developed it during shooting and, reportedly it's either the director or producers came to my mom and said, "We have an idea. We want Miko to have this line. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't answer immediately. She said, "I need to consider this, I'll decide tomorrow" and took a day or two. It was a tough call for her. She said she wasn't sure, but she thought it will probably be one of the most memorable lines from the movie and history proved her correct.